Sunday 25 December 2011

MERRY CHRISTMAS

Just to let you know, we are taking a short break over christmas. But don't worry we will be back in full swing from 2nd January 2012.


For now; eat lots of food, open all your presents and if your still working pick up some stories to send our way. Remember we are looking to post more often in 2012.

submit.stupidcustomers@gmail.com

Also we are looking to increase our audience through Facebook and Twitter, so a little promotion from you over the christmas session would be fantastic ;-)

twitter.com/StupidCustomer_
facebook.com/stupidcustomers

See you again on the 2nd January 2012

SC x

Monday 19 December 2011

Stupid Shoe Shop Customer 3

Stupid Customer
'Can you measure my granddaughter's feet, please?'

Employee
'Certainly, I'll just get the gauge.'

Stupid Customer
'Do you need her shoes off?'

Employee
'It usually helps...'


Submitted by;
Michael Ritchie

Friday 16 December 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 27

Stupid Customer
'The other day you had some nice leather jackets in, but I can't find them in here today.'

Employee
'Okay, well they've just been moved over here.'

Employee walks the Stupid Customer over to the leather jackets

Stupid Customer
'No no, not these ones. It was a different one, but made from the same material.'

Wednesday 14 December 2011

Stupid Shoe Shop Customer 2

Stupid Customer
'I need shoes.'

Employee
'OK sir, what size would you want?'

Stupid Customer
'I don't care, as long as it fits.'

Employee
'Well, is there any style you prefer?'

Stupid Customer
'I don't care, as long as it fits.'

Employee
'I'm sorry sir, but I cannot bring the entire stockroom out here for you to try on.'


Submitted by;
Michael Ritchie

Monday 12 December 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 26

The Stupid Customer approaches the till with a T-shirt and the employee puts it through the till.

Employee
'Thats £19.99 then please'

Stupid Customer
'Cool...!'

The Stupid Customer hands over the money, the employee puts it in the till then bags up the T-shirt. Whilst the Stupid Customer walks out the shop, leaving the item she just paid for behind.

Friday 9 December 2011

Stupid Shoe Shop Customer 1

Stupid Customer
'These shoes have broken. The tops are fine, but they've all crumbled at the heel.'

Employee
'I see that madam, but I've worked here for nearly five years and I've never seen this brand.'

Stupid Customer
'Well, I don't think it's a very good advert for them to break! I buy [company] because of the quality!'

Employee
'I appreciate that, madam, but as I say, these shoes are quite old now. If they sit in a cupboard unworn for, possibly, upwards of five years, this does happen. [explains some of the science]'

Stupid Customer
'Well, I expect them to last! There's nothing you can do?'

Employee
'No, it's an old barcode even, the till won't recognise them.'

Stupid Customer
'I'll leave them with you then. Send them back to the warehouse with a complaint!'

Employee
'OK, madam.'

[Later,  the employee calls up his old boss who's been with the company much longer.]

Employee
'Do you remember a brand of shoes called [brand]?'

Boss
'Um, how do you know that word? They've not done them for eight or so years!'


Submitted by;
Michael Ritchie

Wednesday 7 December 2011

Stupid Call Center Customer 3

Stupid Customer calls up the call center with a problem with her printer.

Employee
'Are you running your printer under Windows?'

Stupid Customer
'No, my desk is next to the door, but thats a good point. The man sitting next to me is by a Window, and his printer is working fine!'


Submitted by;
Sophie Lewis

Monday 5 December 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 25

A Stupid Customer approaches the till area.

Stupid Customer 
'Excuse me, do you have a tape measure I could borrow?'

Employee
'Certainly, here you go madam.'

Stupid Customer
'Thank you, I just want to measure the length of this wrapping paper.'


Submitted by;
Theresa Hargreaves

Friday 2 December 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 24

Stupid Customer
'Excuse me, this egg timer I bought from your shop is not working, can I please return it.’

Employee looks at the instructions for the egg timer for the Stupid Customer.

Stupid Customer
‘This egg timer is too difficult to understand, can I please have the full refund.’

Employee
‘Sorry we don’t offer refunds, only exchanges or credit notes.’

Stupid Customer
‘I don’t want a credit note.’

The Stupid Customer accepts the exchange. However, decides on exchanging the egg timer for an identical one to the original she tried to return.


Submitted by;
Theresa Hargreaves