Monday 31 October 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 16

Stupid Customer exits the changing rooms.

Employee
'How was the T-shirt sir...?'

Stupid Customer 
'It was fine, only could you get me another. This one is a bit dirty around the sleeves'

Employee 
'Oh really? Lets have a look'

Stupid Customer 
'Yes look, just here and here'

Employee
'Sorry sir that is part of the design, its a tie dye  T-shirt'

Friday 28 October 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 15

Stupid Customer walks up to employee holding a Superdry jacket.

Stupid Customer 
'Does Superdry mean this jacket is 100% waterproof?'

Employee 
'No no, its the name of the clothing company'

Monday 24 October 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 14

Stupid Customer walks up to till to purchase his items.

Employee 
'Just these two then sir...?'

Stupid Customer 
'Sorry?'

Employee 
'Just these two items?'

Stupid Customer 
'Sorry!?'

Employee
'Don't worry its a rhetorical question'

Employee carries on at the till with conversation.

Employee
'So how has your day been so far?

Stupid Customer 
'Errr with cash please...!'

Friday 21 October 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 13

Stupid Customer
'Hi do you sell those Hollinster polos in here?

Employee *sounding confused*
'Hollinster???'

Stupid Customer 
Yes, yes HOLLINSTER! I see the clothing everywhere!'

Employee 
'Do you mean, Hollister?'

Stupid Customer 
'No, I don't think so'

Employee
'Well the Hollister store is just down there on your right'

Stupid Customer
'Hmmm okay, I'll give that store a go anyway...thank you!'

Monday 17 October 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 12

Stupid Customer approaches the till and the employee starts to scan her items. A song comes onto the music system which contains a sample of the Baywatch theme tune.

Stupid Customer
'Oh my god, oh my god. I love this song, it always reminds me of Baywatch...!'

Friday 14 October 2011

Stupid Ice Cream Customer 2

A family of 4 enter the ice cream shop (mother, father, brother and sister). The sister is not sure on which ice cream flavour to choose from.

The employee grabs a plastic spoon and offers a tester of one of the flavours to the sister. Her brother copies, and asks for a taster.

Employee grabs another plastic spoon.

The brother leans forward over the counter and opens his mouth waiting to be spoon fed.


Submitted by;
Andrew James Pepin

Wednesday 12 October 2011

Stupid Ice Cream Customer 1

Stupid customer approaches the counter and is looking to buy the cheapest ice cream.

Stupid Customer
'How much is a single cone?'

Employee

'That will be, £1.70...'

Stupid Customer
'Okay.. how much will a single ice cream in a cup?.

Employee 
'That will also be £1.70'

The Stupid Customer continues and chooses the flavour for her ice cream.

Employee
'Is that in a cone or a cup?

Stupid Customer (slightly agitated)
'Well, its fairly obvious isn't it...?'


Submitted by;
Andrew James Pepin

Monday 10 October 2011

Stupid Grocery Customer 3

Stupid Customer walks up to till and the employee starts to scan through their order.

Employee
"You'll just want to swipe your card down, with your stripe pointing towards me."

Stupid Customer proceeds to swipe card into the card reader. However, the till on the opposite side to the employee.

Employee
'Sir, I'm over here...'

Submitted by;
Jamie Blancard 

Friday 7 October 2011

Stupid Grocery Customer 2

Employee
'Will you need to buy any bags with your order?'

Stupid Customer
'No.'

*at the end of her order*
Employee
'And you'll be okay carrying that all out without a bag..?'

Stupid Customer
'Yes.'

Employee
'Okay! Here's your receipt, Thank you so much and have a good weekend.'

Stupid Customer
'Can I have a bag?'

Employee
'.... Umm yeah, sure...'

Stupid Customer
'Am I supposed to give you change or what?'

Employee
'Well, don't worry about it this time It's just 5 cents, just remember for next time, I'm supposed to charge you.'

Stupid Customer
'You don't have to be so RUDE about it. I didn't know you charged.'

Employee
'I'm sorry? I didn't mean to come off rude, I just mean I did ask you a couple times so just remember for next time :) Have a good day!'

The Stupid Customer storms to the end of the till and starts digging around in her purse, speaking angrily to her daughter beside her

Stupid Customer
'We can go home in a minute- She wants me to give her money.'

Employee
'No...Ma'am, please don't worry about it'

Stupid Customer proceeds to now throw five pennies at employee

Employee
'Ma'am you don't need to hurl your change at me, I meant it when I said you could have the bag for free.'

Stupid Customer
'That's it, I want to speak to your manager, you are disgustingly rude!'


Submitted by;
@noisenkisses

Wednesday 5 October 2011

Stupid Coffee Shop Customer

Stupid customer approaches the counter and orders an Espresso. The employee goes ahead with the order and hands over the shot of espresso.

Stupid Customer
'What is this?'

Employee
'Its an espresso sir...'

Stupid Customer
'Really? Wheres the rest of it?'

Employee
'Sir, an espresso is a strongly concentrated shot of coffee with no milk.'

Stupid Customer
'Oh really, no thats not what I wanted.'

Monday 3 October 2011

Stupid Retail Customer 11

Stupid Customer approaches counter with clothes to purchase.

Stupid Customer
'Oh... your wearing the T-shirt I was hoping to buy. However, your employee tells me there are no more in stock.

Employee 
'Oh, I am sorry to hear that. This must of been the last one then, haha'

Stupid Customer
'Yes, it must have been. What size is yours?'

Employee
'This is a size small.'

Stupid Customer 
'Oh perfect! Thats the size I am needed, could you take that T-shirt off and let me buy it!?'